Sunil A N's Blog

Listen and Benefit

Sunil A N — Mon, 10 May 2010 10:17:46 +0000

We all have experienced occasions where we felt that situations would have been much better if we had listened better. We would avoid anger, embarrassment or loss of friendship and instead we would gain confidence, respect, friends, and productivity in whatever we are doing, by better listening. Listening is an essential skill we all should acquire and develop. I would like to talk to you about the process of listening, give you some tips on how to be an effective learner, and will highlight some of the benefits of good listening.
Let us look at the Listening process. Listening is a very interactive process and has three major steps.
The first one is Hearing. Hearing means listening enough to catch what the speaker is saying. The second step is Understanding. This is where you try to understand what you have heard. And the third and final step is Judging. After you are sure you understand what the speaker has said, think about whether it makes sense.
Now that you have a good understanding about the Listening process, let me share with you some tips that would help you become a better listener.
First thing is that you must give full attention to the speaker. Don’t look out of the window. There may be some attractive creatures outside the room that you could see from the window, don’t look at them!
Then, make sure your mind is focused. Don’t let it wonder.
Another important thing is to let the speaker finish before start to talk.
Let yourself finish listening before you start to speak. You cannot really listen if you are busy thinking about what you want to say.
Then, Listen for main ideas. Give special attention to phrases that started statements such as “my point is….” or “the thing to remember is “, etc. Usually, important points are followed after such phrases.
Finally, Ask questions. If you are not sure what the speaker has said, ask the speaker. It is a good idea to state your understanding in your own words of what the speaker has said.
Now that you have a good understanding about the Listening Process and are aware of some tips on how to become a good listener, let me highlight some of the major benefits of good listening.
If you are a good listener, you will earn a bond of respect. You will earn a lot of respect from your colleagues, family, etc. because you are a person who listens to them.
Good listening helps you become more productive. As you are giving time to explain problems the speakers themselves come up with solutions to the problems before you start giving your own advices. This will enable you to come up with a solution faster.

When good listening is in practice, both the speaker and listener will have ‘cooler heads’. Focusing on listening helps both speaker and listener to stay cool. This will help solve problems better especially when they are critical or emotionally driven.
Good listeners will also earn confidence from colleagues. A supervisor who listens well will earn self-esteem and self-image and confidence from others.
As my two daughters were growing up, one day they told me ‘Dad it is true that you are looking after us well and providing necessary comforts but you seldom sit with us and listen. We like you to be more close to us and listen to what we say”. This incident really made me change and started sending quality time with them and their confidence in me greatly increased.
Finally, good listening helps you get accurate information from speakers. Better listening enables better recollection of important points and less miscommunications.
These are some of the benefits good listening can bring about.
Dear Fellow Toastmasters and Distinguished Guests,
Let me recap what I have said so far to conclude my speech.Listening is a very important skill we all should acquire and develop. Listening is also a very interactive process, which has three major steps.There are some good practices to follow if you want to become a good listener. They include, paying attention, being focused, allowing speakers to finish before you respond, are some important ones.Finally, the benefits of good listening include, earning respect and confidence, being more productive in problem solving, and getting accurate information and avoiding miscommunications.I am sure you all are now convinced of the importance and benefits of good listening.
Let me conclude with this saying:
“A wise old owl sat on an oak; the more he saw the less he spoke; the less he spoke the more he heard; why aren’t we like that wise old bird?”

An Alarming Experience

Sunil A N — Mon, 10 May 2010 10:13:49 +0000

What is it? I wake in fright. And the cat dozing at the end of my bed leaps in terror and runs headfirst into the wall. I sit up in bed, my heart pounding and my mind rotating in confusion. The still night air is ripped apart by a sharp stabbing sound.
Is it the phone? Who could be ringing me at this hour? I grab my bedside phone and hold it to my ear. But still the insistent ringing continues.
Is it…it must be …the smoke alarm! Horror! The house is on fire!
I leap out of bed in panic. No time to salvage anything. My one thought is survival. I rush out into the hallway. Where’s the fire? The air is clear. No smoke. No hungry red flames!
I rush from room to room, searching and sniffing for fire. There’s not a trace. But still the smoke alarm shrieks on, jangling my brain with its strident sound.
Is this some kind of joke? How dare it wake me from my exhausted sleep! I switch on the light to see if the alarm can be turned off. Obviously, the only way to stop it is to remove the battery. The alarm is set high on the ceiling.
“Just call us when the battery needs to be changed,” the man had told me when he installed the alarm. “Don’t try to climb up and do it yourself.”
Wouldn’t he just love to be called at 2 a.m.? I ask myself.
I stand on a chair. The alarm is still out of reach. It shrieks on . Surely the neighbors can hear it? It’s a wonder no one has phoned the fire brigade. I’d feel pretty silly if they arrived, but at least someone might be able to stop this racket. I look out the window.
No sign of life anywhere. The neighborhood sprawls in blissful slumber.
I grab my broom, reach up and push the alarm. After a few bashes it gives a final shriek and goes silent. Phew! Peace at last. I turn out the light and flop back into bed. My heart rate has almost returned to normal.
But what’s that? A shuffling sound comes from the corner of the room. It’s obvious that I am not alone. I watch in transfixed horror as the door of my wardrobe slowly creaks open. Someone – or something is about to emerge.
I try to scream but the scream sticks in my throat as out… creeps … the cat!! She nervously resumes her place on the end of my bed and carefully washes her face.
With a sigh of relief I collapse weakly on my pillow and finally fall fast asleep.
Suddenly the room reverberates once more with the ear piercing sound. That infernal alarm again!
I leap out in fury, turn on the light, grab the broom and hit the alarm. Again and again. It stops – then it starts, stops and starts again. Each time I put the broom down, the noise starts, pounding in my brain, taunting me.
“I’ll fix you for good!” I shout. I keep ramming and bashing it with the broom handle. The alarm seems as though it will never give in. Well, neither will I. I’ll kill it this time!
Finally, I give it a mighty whack. The alarm loses its grip on the ceiling and lands at my feet, still protesting loudly. I perform the final act by wrenching out the battery.
Silence. My head is still ringing, but the night is at rest once more.
I turn the alarm over. The warning on the back – which I hadn’t been aware of – says, “Gives a warning chirp when the battery is low.” Chirp! They call that a chirp?
I throw away the battery. If I get that smoke alarm put back up, it will be on the wall where I can reach it.
No doubt smoke alarms do save lives when they warn in time of real danger. But what if that unnecessary fright had given me a heart attack? And it could happen to a frail, elderly person. If I had died in the night, they probably would have performed an autopsy to determine the cause.
But would anyone have suspected the real culprit – the smoke alarm? I wonder.

FRIENDSHIP

Sunil A N — Mon, 10 May 2010 10:10:26 +0000

Everyone calls himself a friend, but only a fool relies on it: nothing is commoner than the name, nothing rarer than the thing
I cannot count the times people I hardly know have referred to me as a “friend,” or have written to me and signed their letters “your friend,” or done some such thing. I have come to believe that, second only to “love,” “friend” is the most misused word in the English language.
It is not my wish to offend or to hurt anyone who has, in the past, called himself my “friend,” but merely to set them straight. There are a good many upstanding people…people whom I admire…who have called themselves “friends.” Most of these are people who I enjoy spending time with and conversing with, but they are not friends. People must learn to distinguish between “friendliness” and “friendship.”
Whenever I tell someone that I have only a handful of friends, they’re not entirely sure on how to respond. The proper response would be hearty congratulations, for I have taken the advice of George Washington, who said, “Be courteous to all, but intimate with few, and let those few be well tried before you give them your confidence. True friendship is a plant of slow growth, and must undergo and withstand the shocks of adversity before it is entitled to the appellation.”
The word “friend” is one that is slung around often in this world, but very few people seem to know what it actually means. “Friend” is not a word to play fast and loose with, nor is it a term to be hastily applied to a person you happen to be acquainted with. “Friend” is a word to be used carefully, because “friends” are to be chosen very carefully.
“What is a friend?” ask Aristotle. He answers, “A single soul dwelling in two bodies.” Your average acquaintance, however close and however interesting, does not share your soul.
“A true friend “is the gift of God, and He only who made hearts can unite them!” Friends are rare, and one may live many years without finding even one true friend. “The difficulty is not so great to die for a friend, as to find a friend worth dying for.” I consider myself rich because I have found atleast one true friend worth dying for.
A true friend is more than just an interesting person to speak with for an hour or two so as to pass the time. Rather, a friend is someone to depend on, someone to lean on, someone who is necessary for life. “Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour. For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him that is alone when he fillet ; for he hath not another to help him up. Again, if two lie together, then they have heat: but how can one be warm alone? And if one prevails against him, two shall withstand him; and a threefold cord is not quickly broken.”
Real friendship is lasting. I know people who have spoken of their “school friends” who they forgot about when they graduated and began college or a career. These people were not real friends. “A friend loves at all times,” Saint Jerome said that, “The friendship that can cease has never been real.”
Friends argue, friends offer correction, friends are even sometimes angry at each other…and these things are all natural and to be expected in a real friendship.
Though friendship with unbelievers and evil people is discouraged, true friends are open with each other, and overlook one another’s faults. ” Elbert Hubbard said, “Your friend is the man who knows all about you, and still likes you.”
It has been over a year-and-a-half since I made a new friend, and I am not only content with that, but happy for it. Old friends are the best. Walt Whitman spoke the gospel truth when he said, “I no doubt deserved my enemies, but I don’t believe I deserved my friends.”
Two inseparable friends, Sam and Jason, met with an accident on their way to Boston City. The following morning, Sam woke up blind and Jason was still unconscious. The doctor was standing at his bedside looking at his health chart and medications with a thoughtful expression on his face. When he saw Sam awake, he beamed at him and asked.” How are you feeling today Sam?” Sam tried to put up a brave face and smiled back saying, “absolutely wonderful Doctor. I am very grateful for all that you have done for me. “The doctor was moved at Sam’s deed. All that he could say was, “You are a very brave man Sam and God will make it up to you in one way or another”. While he was moving on to the next patient, Sam called back at him almost pleading, “promise me you won’t tell Jason anything”.
“You know I won’t do that. Trust me.” Said the doctor and walked away.
“Thank you “whispered Sam. He smiled and looked up in prayer ” I hope I live up to your ideas…please give me the strength to be able to go through this.

Months later when Jason had recuperated considerably, he stopped hanging around with Sam. He felt discouraged and embarrassed to spend time with a disabled person like Sam.
Sam was lonely and disheartened, since he didn’t have any body else other than Jason to count on. Things went from bad to worse. And one day Sam died in despair. When Jason was called on his burial, he found a letter waiting for him. Dr Berkeley gave it to him with an expressionless face and said” This is for you Jason. Sam had asked me to give it to you when he was gone”.

In the letter he had said: “Dear Jason, I have kept my promise to lend you my eyes if anything happened to yours. Now there is nothing more that I can ask from God, than the fact that you will see the world through my eyes. You will always be my best friend……..Sam”.
When he had finished reading Dr. Berkeley said ” I had promised Sam to keep his sacrifice he made, a secret from you. But now I wish I didn’t stick it because I don’t think it was worth it”.
All that was left for Jason while he stood there was tears of regret and memories of Sam for the rest of his life.
Fellow toastmasters,
Remember, no matter what, if we make a friend, we should stick by him till the end. Life is meaningless without a friend.

Solitary!!!

Sunil A N — Thu, 06 May 2010 07:03:13 +0000

I could feel that something was amiss…….something which I could not figure out myself either. I wondered that since everything has been going on so well then why that empty feeling is surfacing again and again. I have noticed that even if all is going on so perfect around me and I even have my share of fun and frolic, still by the end of the day I feel gloomy. Why? What is it that I am missing so much? I have lots of good friends, good work environment, my own family members, TV to watch, music to listen to. But still d feeling of loneliness haunts me……
Neither I have done anything wrong to anyone nor I wished them bad, but still I will be mistaken why?
Why do I feel so alone inside while I have everyone to back me up. Do they really care? Do they really love me?
Did I do something wrong to feel like this? Is everything true?

I got you where I want you …. And now I’m gonna eat you

Sunil A N — Tue, 01 Dec 2009 07:41:44 +0000

It was two weeks after summer vacation had started and two boys, Logan and Michael were bored. Michael asked Logan what he wanted to do and he replied by daring him into the haunted house across the block. In return, Logan did the same.

They walked out and turning the corner and were eventually face to face with the haunted house. Since Logan was dared first he went in first. As soon as he stepped in, there was a cool breeze. He heard footsteps and a door open. After 5 seconds he heard the same door slam shut. He got so freaked out that he headed for the bed.

Next came Michael, except that he doesn’t hear the footsteps or the slamming door. He hears a childish voice calling out “I got you where I want you, and now I’m gonna eat you. I got you where I want you, and now I’m gonna eat you.” Michael got scared too and ran under the bed with Logan. They started to shake uncontrollably. Again they hear the voice only now it sounds closer… closer… closer… stop. By now they just want to leave the house. Since the noise had stopped they slowly came out from under the bed.

When they got out from under the bed they saw a little boy picking his nose chanting the same thing, I got you where I want you, and now I’m gonna eat you. I got you where I want you, and now I’m gonna eat you.

2009 India Mobility Trends

Sunil A N — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 04:38:16 +0000

2008 was an exciting year in the Indian mobile space. The user base has grown by about 100 million, many new operators have got licences to launch operations, and the 3G auction is just around the corner. So, what does 2009 have in store for us?

Here is a brief summary of the ten trends that will define the mobile space in India in 2009:

Subscriber growth in India will continue, driven by rural expansion, entry of newer operators, 3G and cheaper handsets.
Incumbent operators will face challenges (and opportunities) on four fronts: new operators, mobile number portability, 3G and MVNOs.
Focus on Value-added Services and Data will increase in saturated, urban markets.
Mobile VAS operators which build direct-to-consumer relationships will start emerging.
Flat-rate Data Plans will accelerate the use of the Mobile Internet, Social Media and Rich Media.
Operators and/or handset players will launch AppStores to drive usage, innovation and revenues.
Mobile Payments and Commerce will come into vogue for microtransactions.
Companies will create multi-faceted mobile presence to deepen customer relationships and drive permission-based interaction and engagement.
The Mobile will emerge as the next advertising and marketing medium – and be seen as capable of not just mass reach but also allow a high degree of targeting.
The 2009 general elections will be an inflection point in the usage of mobiles in many different ways.

1. Subscriber Growth Continues: India is now growing at about 10 million new mobile users every month, and that pace of growth will continue. We will probably be close to 450 million subscribers by end of 2009. Four factors will drive growth of the mobile subscriber base: footprint expansion by existing operators especially in rural India, launch of operations by newer operators, issuing of 3G licences which will open up a new world of data services, and cheaper handsets which will even further lower entry barriers.

2. Incumbent Operators will face Multiple Challenges: The Indian market going ahead can be thought of us two markets: the Red Market which is the competition-filled, saturated urban battlegrounds (top 40-odd cities in India) and accounts for about 100-150 million subscribers, and the Blue Market covering the rest of India, with a potential size of upto a billion subscribers, of whom only 15-20% have actually got a mobile phone. The Red Market wants Data and Value-Added Services (VAS), while the Blue Market needs Access (Voice). A new landscape is emerging in India driven by four simultaneous disruptions — new operators entering the fray, mobile number portability rollout, 3G services, and the green signal for MVNOs (Mobile Virtual Network Operators).

3. Operators will focus on VAS and Data Services in the Red Market: Voice, SMS and quality of network can no longer be used for differentiation – they are now hygiene. The Red Market subscribers got a phone in the first decade of India’s wireless rollout between 1995-2005. They have been using Voice and P2P SMS for between 3 and 13 years. They now want to do much more with their phone – and their time is now coming. 3G will be a big enabler for richer services, and can actually drive higher ARPUs (Average Revenue Per User). We will also see the emergence of Data MVNOs – or mobile computing operators.

4. The Coming Era of VAS Operators: Today, 90% of operators revenues comes from Voice and Rentals. Of the balance 10%, about half comes from Person-to-Person (P2P) SMS. So, VAS accounts for only about 5% of revenue. Operators have primarily focused on voice. I see a new breed of companies emerging who will create direct-to-consumer services and focus exclusively on VAS – think of them as VAS Operators. They will have multiple revenue streams – not just from subscribers, but also from advertisers and businesses. They will be the Genies that make the mobile as magic lamps in the hands of consumers.

5. Flat-rate Data Plans will drive the use of Mobile Internet, Social Media and Rich Media: The US leads the way here. From being a laggard in the use of mobile data, the US is now showing the way with all operators having flat-rate data plans. In India, the right price point, according to me, is Rs 100 per month. A plan like this will encourage the use of the mobile Internet and other services, and create the necessary pull for companies to start building out mobile data services. Operators will benefit from large-scale adoption of data plans. The mobile is ideally positioned to be a window into the incremental N3 (Now-New-Near) Web). Mobile social networks will extend the communication and interaction capabilities of the device. From mail to music, from digisodes to streaming TV channels, the combination of smartphones, flat-rate data plans and 3G will be the gateway to a wide array of rich media.

6. Expect the launch of AppStores: Given the huge success of Apple’s store for mobile applications and Google following suit with its Android Market, I expect Indian operators and handset players to also create AppStores. These stores will open up the content and applications market to just about anyone, and drive both usage and innovation, and also create newer revenue streams for themselves. This will be the first steps in the opening up of operator walled gardens.

7. Mobile Payments and Commerce will come into vogue: This will happen via three mechanisms. First, the mobile cash balance with an operators could be used for payments. Second, a credit card or debit card could be linked with a mobile phone or number, enabling only an instruction to be issued for making payments. Finally, independent companies could encourage the creation of cash balances to be used for off-deck services. Taken together, the mobile has the potential to emerge at the centre of micropayments.

8. Companies will start creating their Mobile Presence: A mobile presence is much more than setting up a Keyword on a shortcode for lead-generation. Early Adopters will start integrating the mobile (especially SMS and the mobile Internet) into each of their business processes. They will use permission-based channels (rather than spam) to build deeper customer relationships and drive greater engagement.

9. Emergence of Mobile as a Mass and Targeted Medium: Today, the Mobile is one of four new media that ad agencies and business look at along with FM, Out-of-home and the Internet. Given the user base that is already there, the mobile is ready for breaking out of the pack. It has the attributes of a mass medium like TV and print, and can combine the targeting that the Internet offers.

10. The 2009 Elections will be an inflection point for Mobile usage: More than half of the voting Indian population will have a mobile – which is a two-way interactive device. As the Mumbai attacks showed, while TV can rouse passion, it is the mobile which gets people organised and working towards common goals. Just as the US elections of 2008 were a defining moment in the use of Internet and mobile, I believe that the 2009 general elections in India will drive innovation in how the mobile is used for building communities, citizen journalism, advertising and more.

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Sunil A N — Thu, 19 Mar 2009 13:01:25 +0000

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